CONFIDENTIAL: “…I don’t want this to end”

I confess that this Sabbath was a bit different from the usual Happy Sabbath that I always have.  I attended “Sacramento Church” and went for an outreach program.  I was in-charge of the activity–cooking activity.  We ate out with Teacher Kat’s family then went home.  I was too excited to check if I have new messages.  Lo and behold! I have!  The messages were not the ones I expected to them to be. Maybe I was just so stressed and burned out that I reacted negatively.  My replies were dramatic yet harsh.  I am still thinking about it now and I don’t know what has gotten into my brain that I said those words.  I figured out he was still online when he got my messages because he contacted me right away.  He tried to clear it and said he was sorry for the miscommunication.  I was sorry, too.  I know I should have not said those words.  Anyways, we came to the point of…”is this it?” I must say I was not sure why I said it.  I don’t want whatever we have right now to end.  Probably, I just missed him.  I miss the funny talks that we usually have.  But my missing him and my bad feelings were not well mixed that’s why unnecessary issues between us arose.  He asked me if I want to end this.  Of course I did not want to, right? I’m glad he concluded the issues with, “It’s up to you if you want to end this.  But I just want to make it clear to you that I don’t want this to end.”

I’m not sure what will happen next…Let’s just pray and hope for the best!

____________

Posted on October 4th, 2008

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